Hedge scalping 2: Send for reinforcements!

Back in September, I wrote about tackling the annual hedge trimathon. In part 1, I was steeling myself for the job ahead. Now in part 2, I'll take you though this year's change of strategy.

Every year I gripe about trimming the hedge cos it's such a chew on. But this year I decided it was time to garden smarter: I wheeled out the big guns.

Toys!

There are a lot of hedge trimmers on the market, but I have some key needs that quickly narrow the field:

1. Must be electric

Yeah, I've read it all about you get more oomph from petrol & electric trimmers are wimps. But we already have a petrol power tool in our arsenal, a strimmer, & I just can't start the fucker. All that priming, choke tickling, chord ripping nonsense, in this day & age?! Motorbikes have had starter motors for over 50 years ffs. No excuse for it. Get your act together, 2 stroke engineers!!!!

& relax...

moving on...

2. Must chop large sticks

The laurel is such a beast that strong green new growth can already be over 10mm diameter by mid summer. What a monster.

So I needed something with big sharp teeth AND the power to use them.

Final decision hung on power delivery...

3. Batteries v cable?

I was very tempted by batteries - Monty Don has extolled the virtues of the rechargeable batteries route, & I can see that having no trailing cable is handy when your garden covers half of Hampshire.

But on the flipside, I had read a number of reviews saying that whilst the batteries do fine in year 1, performance seriously drops of in years 2 & 3. New batteries every year or so? Doesn't sound very eco to me.

So, as our garden is small enough for every extremity to be in easy reach of a cable, cable it is. I'm pretty sure I can manage not to chop through it or trip over it. Pretty sure...

And the winner is...

Ladies & Gentleman, may I present to you, the Bosch AHS 7000 Pro-T.

Nope, no idea what AHS nor T stand for. Probably nowt...

Awww yeah. Check out that bad boy :)

5 stars on Amazon, plus loads of reviews confirming it's ability to mangle even the toughest customers. Some concerns about weight, but some others saying it's not really a bother...

A swift visit to B&Q & it's mine, all MINE!

Just imagine... I could be this happy when trimming the hedge...

Is that a light breeze or did the hedge just tremble? Mwhahahaha!

Apathy in the face of cold, hard logic

What a beautiful day. Big blue skies all day long. A welcome respite from this year's seemingly endless rain.

I've got the whole day free & I've got things to do. Top of the list is to plant out the bulbs I bought over a month ago... I do this all the time - get over-excited at the garden centre & then neglect my purchases as soon as I get them home. Such a stoopid waste.

A bag of these beauties lie neglected in a corner of the garage...

So the bulbs need planting out sharpish, but it's not as simple as getting out there & bashing them in. I'm planning on doing some more structural work this Winter so I don't want plant the bulbs now only to end up scything through them all when I'm in demoliton mode.

The plan

Plant the bulbs in pots instead. Then in the Spring I can place them out when all the heavy work is over.
Great.
Only, the are 2 slight problems:

1. I don't have enough pots.
2. I don't have enough compost.

No biggie. Easily solved by a quick trip to the garden centre.

Only...

I can't quite summon the motivation to get out of the door.

A leisurely lie-in with coffee & biscuits. Then a bit of Facebookage whilst watching the final of The Great British Bake Off; straight into MotoGP; then the last race in World Triathlon Series, Women's & Men's in New Zealand, watching Jonny Brownlee become world champ; now the British Touring Cars at a sopping wet Brands Hatch... I've only moved from the sofa for coffee refuels & a bacon sarnie.

& the most stupid, most infuriating thing is that this is my last free weekend til December, & I still can't stick a boot in my sorry ass to get out there. Yay for an exciting social diary, but the garden pays the price.

It's a done deal now - the shops will be shut & it's getting dark.

I need another plan...

Moorbank Botanic Gardens threatened with closure

Noooooooooo!
I only just found it...

This week the Journal reported that Moorbank Botanic Gardens is to close. Newcastle University are pulling the plug on this little green oasis in the City.

Who knew there was a tropical paradise on the edge of the moor at the top of Claremont Road? Not me, that's for sure, & I used to work on Claremont Road. I must've driven past its gates a thousand times.

But I was given a heads up earlier this Summer when I went to an open evening a Moorbank with some green-fingered friends from work, & it was fab.

More about Moorbank

Rather than me mashing up their history, here's the description from the Moorbank Facebook page:

The garden has been used by botanists from the University since 1923.

& the research continues to this day - when we visited, there was an area cordoned off outside that was under test, plus there was what looked like a drought wheat trail in one of the hot houses.

In 1981, the area under cultivation was increased to over 1 hectare to provide a safe haven for rare plants donated to the University from the Kilbryde Garden in Corbridge.

Sadly, it turns out that haven may not be so safe... The plants were collected by Randle Cooke, a very private but dedicated exotic plant expert. He built his collection over 70 years, growing seeds brought back from all over the world by more intrepid plant hunters. The Hexham Courant has a fab article about the Kilbryde rescue which includes a great profile of Cooke.

In 1985, the new glasshouses were acquired to house experimental facilities and collections of tropical, dryland and insectivorous plants.

This part of the visit was amazing: a tropical section & a desert section, both packed with fabulous exotic species. The tropical area has a large collection of carnivorous plants such as this monster:

One of the many pitcher plans in the Tropical House

And to keep the atmosphere moist in the jungle, there's a little pond with trickling stream.

Lots of greenery round the Tropical House's pond

In 2000, the garden was further extended to allow for new developments including a hay meadow, wildlife hedge and Northumberland bed.

Apparently the hedge had a spot of bother recently after neighbouring cows had a bit of a maraud...

Also outside in the grounds is a little lake, although to be fair this Summer it was a little tricky to tell where the lake stopped the lawn started. But the bog plants were loving it.

Gunnera, outdoors by the little lake

Mind, Moorbank seem to be doing a better job at controlling the slugs & snails that the rest of the nation this Summer, as evidenced by the fabulous leaves on their giant hosta.

Huge hosta with impeccable leaves... not that I'm envious... not much...

As much as I love them, I've given up with hostas. Our resident snail population is so vast there's just no point. Instead I'm going to research how to go about harvesting snails for the garlic & butter treatment... I kid you not & you'll be the 1st to know.

A little work for charidee

One to drool, please...

Moorbank isn't normally open to the public, but we got in cos it throws the doors wide from time to time under the banner of the National Gardens Scheme. The Scheme is a fabulous way of getting a glimpse into places & spaces not normally open to the public.

& in a fit of IT fervour not commonly associated with horticulture, the scheme has an iPhone app. Yes really.

Moorbank will be opening it's doors again next year. I think we paid an entrance fee of £3 each. Plus there were tasty cakes & gorgeous little plants for sale. All the proceeds to charity.

Moorbank Open Days 2013

• Sunday 17th March, 1-4pm
• Wednesday 22nd May, 4-7pm with wine
• Sunday 21st July, 2-5pm
• Sunday 8th September, 2-5pm

Visit while you still can, & keep an eye on the Moorbank Facebook page for the latest news...

Are you talking to your plants in the right accent?

How we love the idea that talking to plants, or playing them music, could give better results. & to be fair, who wouldn't make like Douglas the runner bean & do their best for Felicity Kendall?

But this week a garden centre guy in Essex claimed accent had an influence - it's not what you say, but how you say it too.

Moving on from Tom & Barbara's ground breaking work on emotional impact, these guys played a variety of regional UK accents to a load of unsuspecting geraniums.

Their conclusions? Geordie tones work best, followed closely by Welsh. Well, it works for call centres.

Maybe this is why Geordie onions & leeks are so big... although for those, years of competitive selective breeding can't be completely ruled out just yet. Either way, I can't say I'm in any hurry to pipe Let's Get Ready To Rhumble into the greenhouse any time soon ;)